DNFO

Do Not Freak Out.

Sometimes I write these four letters on my wrist when I'm feeling anxious, and most of the time it helps me to stop, put things back into perspective, and then get on with life.  Its quite a genius coping mechanism, if you ask me.  Of course, there are some times that it just doesn't work, and a complete freak out is necessary.

Likely subjects of future Freak Out rants will include boys, relationships, work, job searches, aparatment searches, what I'm supposed to be doing with my life, how dirty my dishes get, budgets, friends, and other various frustrations.  

Currently I'm in the process of moving cities.  I'll likely end up in my parent's basement for a month or so, until I find a job and an apartment in the larger city.  I'll be moving 300 miles from my current residence, away from college friends, two years worth of co-workers, and a not-boyfriend.  I'll be moving closer to family, old friends, and hopefully some opportunities such as Grad School, or Art School, or being a bum.

Wait, what is a Not-Boyfriend, you may ask?!  Well, after I made the decision to move, i met a very nice looking and strapping young man.  And despite my upcoming move, we started seeing each other.  Apparently there was a night that he actually asked me out, but did so very covertly, and i didn't catch on, and therefore turned him down... and then realized my mistake way too late, and because i lack the ability to say things out loud (or avoid run-on sentences), we never became "official."  Now it didn't bother me to not have lables, but apparently it drove him crazy.  Which is kinda sweet.  And although we've been casually making out for the last 6 months, we decided to take a step back, and see if we can end this maturely.  

Tonight is his birthday, and although I was invited to join them if they (his roommates, etc) go out, its now 8:30, and haven't heard anything from him in several hours.  There are plenty of possible reasons for this:

1. They haven't gone out yet. 

2. He's decided it would be too awkward to hang out.

3. He's completely a flake, and hasn't realized he didn't text me with outting information.

4. His house got hit by an astroid, and they are all now just smoking piles of ashes, and can't call.

Reason #1 is most likely, with #3 right on its heals.  I realize it is only 8:30, but i'm an old lady (at 26) and don't process alcohol very well.  I'm actually not likely to be very fun.  And I'm not sure i could stand watching him hit on anyone else.  Apparently I'm jealous and insecure.  

So maybe he'll call.  and Maybe I'll stay home and watch a movie.  

and Maybe I'll just eat otterpops til i pass out... which might be soon.

-Lemon Out.